Should I call it town or city? I don't know the difference between those two, earnestly. What do you expect from a reluctant immigrant? Though technically I am not an immigrant, not anymore. I just do not feel like I belong here, not in Toronto anyway though I cannot say anything bad about it.
I live here, I have a good modest apartment with everything included in it and not that terribly pricey as you might expect in a big city, could be worse. I work. I still have my 2 cats with me though they are not that happy living on a third floor with no escape to the streets that's what they'd love to do, bur cannot. Balcony they don't like, though I find it rather convenient for me. Sometimes I can even have my breakfast there, sitting and enjoying 5 minutes of fresh air and summer breeze before I go to work.
The area is a little bit noisy, it's the corner almost the corner of intersection of 2 large streets that are never quiet completely - day or light. Cars, big trucks, what not, 24 hours a day. Well, you cannot have everything. It's still modest pay in comparison to other areas. I want to move out of this nice town though, I want to live somewhere with less of everything, where I can hear birds and be able to talk to somebody on a street without rising my voice, just to walk on a street without all that deathening noise of a big city.
I'd like to have some river, lake, some water near by, so I can enjoy nature a little bit more. The problem is always the same - work. Where can I find work in a smaller city? I do not have a demanded profession, skills that can easily land you a job anywhere. Nowadays even with skills people are struggling. I am not a nurse or a doctor, I cannot expect to drop one job and to find another right away.
Money, money, why do we always need them? I feel like I work too much but not going anywhere, like nothing to look forward to. If I retire at 65, I am not going to get enough money to live comfortably on, I will still have to work and I hate that. And I am still far from 65, I still have to work and work, and work... I live frugally but I still do not have savings, I have to think about living in poverty if I retire and I hate that. Being old and poor, what could be worse?
Well, Toronto is a good city. It's clean, lots of nice parks, Ontario lake you can go to if you can endure 1-2 hours trip (without a car), because public transportation right now is not that great. Far from that. Most of the time I just prefer to stay at home, when I have a luxury of free time of course. I am not keen on restaurants or pubs, as it is always require money I do not have, or time I do not posses either. So other than work nothing keeps me in Toronto, well, it gives my two sons place to live I guess, but I am sure they will manage without me.
The question is where else can I possibly go? Any ideas?
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