Okay, life is not over yet. I am still here and breathing that means that life goes on and it's spring time. Though it's not warm yet but it's going that direction. I've been living in London Ontario for a year now and it was not a very interesting year but nothing bad happened either. My youngest son finally found a job after university in his specialty, not in Canada unfortunately, but in US. But it's a good job and hopefully he is happy where he is, though I miss him every day but that's my life now. All birds go out of their nest eventually, it's life. You just have to deal with your loneliness and depression in only way possible - keep yourself busy. I am trying very hard to do just that.Life in London, Ontario is not difficult for me as I don't have to look for a job at this period of my life and I suspect there is not a lot of jobs in London. Lots of immigrants come here every day from all over the world but mostly to study as I can see. I found one friend here. She is from Mexico and her husband is from Poland. Unfortunately for me she has a young daughter and not much time to socialize and I understand her as I've been there too and with 3 small children. I was planning to move somewhere else from London but now I am not so sure. I am used to London by now and if I will be able to find another apartment closer to food stores so I don't have to take a bus to buy some food than I may as well stay in London. I don't like my apartment at all. It's very cold in winter. They keep garbage under my apartment as I live on the second floor and it smells sometimes and last but not least - I don't have any sun in my place and this drawback is very serious to me, especially in winter. May be I will be able to find something else I can afford on a sunny side, I don't know. My right hand still not working properly, but I keep working with it, trying to lift things at least with it when I can. It becomes better but very slowly and I am not sure I will be able to do serious thing like writing or eating with it ever again.
My writing with left hand still looks terrible and I often do not understand myself what I write and it's very annoying but I still try to do some writing every day. I read Italian book and every time (very often) when I do not understand a word, I look for this word in a dictionary and write it down, sometimes it helps to remember, sometimes it does not. I know you need to train your brain to remember things, to learn new ones.
For me learning was never a problem but now I am not at school and motivation for learning is much weaker. Still I am sure I can learn a couple of languages and may be use this knowledge for something useful. I like being useful. I wish I could adopt a child but I am too old for that and too damaged physically unfortunately. I can adopt a dog or cat but I do not like dogs very much and I do not like to keep cats on a second floor in a small apartment, so no companion for me, just my books I guess.
